Adult Attachment Disorder
Invite love, and the joy of genuine intimacy back into your life
Change the effects of Adult Attachment Disorder
Attachment is an inborn system in the brain which evolves in ways that influence and organize motivational, emotional, and memory processes with respect to significant caregiving figures. Designed to increase an infant’s survival, this system motivates infants to seek proximity to caregivers and to establish communication with them. Simply put, our early experiences with our primary caregivers form an internal template which exerts a powerful, unconscious influence on our adult relationships.
The quality of our earliest relationships with our caregivers— whether we felt seen, valued, and had our needs met in a loving and timely way—determine our ultimate experience of ourselves and others as adults. Therefore, if we never had our needs met in a timely fashion, or even if they were met where done so on an unpredictable schedule, a negative attachment pattern is established. Attachment problems negatively affect our feeling of safety and our capacity to connect with the world around us.
There is no such thing as a perfect parent, but, it is important to note that as children, our parents are the ‘all powerful’ center of our universe; whatever they think about us must be true, and their treatment of us deserved. Consequently, due to the lack of perspective from which to cast doubt on their assessments, they are internalized and incorporated into how we view ourselves— negative or positive. And whether our caregivers were simply unknowing, unable, or unavailable to provide adequate attention and nurturing, or regardless if their treatment of us was intentionally or unintentionally hurtful, the impact remains the same.
Attachment issues, sometimes called developmental trauma, can set us up for an unbelievably difficult time having genuine self-esteem, and creating the safe, healthy, nurturing, and satisfying relationships we crave.
Healing Happens Here
STAR Can Help
Grieving childhood pain is difficult, yet necessary to properly move forward into our adult roles. At STAR, we offer an opportunity for healing and mastering the original hurts which allows you to finally step away from repeated, unconscious cycles of re-enactment In our work with adult attachment disorder, we will assist you in becoming aware of past losses, incompletions, negative imprints, and repetitive destructive patterns in your life. Then, providing you opportunities to integrate and heal these roadblocks paving the way toward growth and happiness.
The primary goal of STAR is to facilitate positive change – new choices, perspectives, options, behaviors, coping strategies, and relationships. We provide a safe, collaborative environment in which you can cut through past defenses and discover healthier, more productive behaviors.
“STAR was the best therapeutic process I have ever been to. It stripped away years of crusty layers of pretended indifference to reveal my repeated cycles of anger, abandonment, fear and despair. It may very well lead me to the happiness and sense of peace I’ve yearned for. It’s all up to me now, not the ghosts of my past.”
“STAR opened me up to see that I do have within me the capability to be happy and free. For the first time in my life, I experienced that. It has been a struggle since STAR, but the struggle is not the same hopeless struggle as before. I have seen and felt my true radiant self; that is what helps me when I get caught by the ‘old stuff’ again.”
“STAR creates the family environment under which all children are able to grow and thrive. STAR also gave me a wonderful family that I can call on and who can call on me. I always wanted to be loved for who I was— warts and all— and STAR gave me that. And most importantly, STAR taught me how to love myself.”