Discovering Your Mental Models, Core Beliefs, and Essence Statement

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  1. Bring to mind the current situation that was upsetting… What sensations do you notice in your body as you bring that situation to mind? Is this feeling familiar?
  1. Can you think of an earlier time you might have felt this? (young adult) Describe that situation. What sensations do you notice in your body as you bring that situation to mind?
  1. What might have been a very early (child) situation where you might have felt this way? What sensations do you notice in your body as you bring that situation to mind?
  1. As you focus on that earliest time, what do you imagine your Little One might be feeling?
  1. What do you imagine your Little One is telling herself (himself) about herself (himself)? What did she/he begin to believe about herself (himself)? I’m not okay; I’m not good enough; I’m not lovable, etc.
  1. What do you imagine your Little One began to believe about others / the world? It’s not safe; others are good/ capable/ smart, etc. but I’m not.
  1. How do you imagine your Little One decided to be in order to stay safe and get her/ his needs met? How did she/ he (unconsciously) decide to act? I’ll be good; take of others; not have needs of my own OR act out; be angry; take what I need, etc.
  1. Your Little One believes XXX about her/himself. What is really TRUE? (Is it true that she is unlovable? That he’s not smart?) Make a note about what is TRUE. That you are lovable, capable, etc.
  1. This becomes your ESSENCE STATEMENT, your affirmation about yourself. When we incorporate our TRUTH, there is much easier to live in our Nurturing Adult space. Write your Essence Statement and continue to use it.

© Marti Glenn and Ken Bruer 2014 Co-Directors of the STAR Foundation